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Is JOHN CARPENDER an Irritant? Do squid have beaks? The answer, of course, is maybe yes, maybe no. Irritation is a primary feature of his world. He's been known to play drums with many musical entities including MICHAEL McDERMOTT, "MYSTERY DRIVER," and BARRELHOUSE CHUCK. Chicago is a weird and wanton place and Mr. Carpender can be found lurking there. Does he sing? Play bass? Drums? Guitar? Squid? Only CAPTAIN KABLOOEY knows for sure. But he is featured on no fewer than six cd's now available online. If he was a shameless self promoter, he might tell you where to look for them. Alas, he is more like an ambitious hack with a shitty computer who couldn't find those recordings, even if he was looking in his own living room. His wife, however, could tell you where to find them. She also always knows where he's left his car keys. Lucky for him. (MOTION DISCOMFORT, BITE ME I'M HOME, WHAT GIVES?, THE THREE HEMISPHERES OF SANTAPEDE'S VILLAGE, HARSH, BRICK, BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS)
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JEFF DEMAND is the Irritant of age, not to be confused with Bert Convey. "MONSIEUR HULOT BITES THE ROTATING CAROUSEL OF DEATH" was the first musical piece written by Jeff and Dean. Little did they know what a smash hit it would be. Many years later, Jeff can still be found sitting in his rubber Lazy-Boy hearing the song being performed over and over again in his own mind. Jeff plays mainly keyboards, recorder, strings, and wind blowin's. Influenced by GEORGE and IRA, FRANK, and BOB, his music is ever changing. never does the song remain the same. Also, Jeff is incidentally or accidentally (depends on the shit yer smokin') inspired by the QUEEN OF IRRITATION (no, not Dean), his loverly wife COLLEEN. Jeff has performed character voices for some of Dean's wacky projects. Jeff's son, YOUNG MASTER KEVIN, a Jedi Knight, appears on the "BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS" cd. Jeff's whole family wishes you all the best and hopes you will be totally irritated by "THE IRRITANTS's" catalog of malarkey. Jeff also wishes for you to remember to vote and to promote peace in this whacked out, crazy little booger in space we live on called Earth. (MOTION DISCOMFORT, BITE ME I'M HOME, WHAT GIVES?, THE THREE HEMISPHERES OF SANTAPEDE'S VILLAGE, HARSH, BRICK, BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS)
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When DEAN KENDRICK isn't daydreaming, he's asleep. Apart from the 200 lb. iron block chained to his ankle to keep him earthbound, he's really just a cerebral file clerk shrouded in bone. Born the year of JFK's assassination and four hours after John's birth, Dean began his attitude with an early lust for fluid DISNEY animation and fantasy, "THE BEATLES" and "PINK FLOYD," and amateur theatrics. Sweetening this with the discovery of FRANK ZAPPA and TOM WAITS, ALFRED HITCHCOCK, STANLEY KUBRICK, and DAVID LYNCH, and obscure foreign animated short subjects, Dean went mad. Living in a box, Dean spits out what he can - experimental animations, coarsely fine art stuffs, and funeral dance hits - all according to the orders in his noodle. Dean is gay and not a lifestyle. Dean is also a lifetime member of himself. (MOTION DISCOMFORT, BITE ME I'M HOME, WHAT GIVES?, THE THREE HEMISPHERES OF SANTAPEDE'S VILLAGE, HARSH, BRICK, BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS)
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RICH MULLEN is not a real Canadian Mountie but he plays one on T.V. As well as being a pronounced guitar diddler, Rich has been caught engineering and providing psychological support at EDGE AUDIO SERVICES, Chicago. He devises sonic scaping for the needful, and sonic scraping for the corners. Rich is secretly involved with the band "PUNCH," and not with the band "JUDY." Not publicly anyway. Oh, and he's not involved with the "NOT" band anymore, either, or. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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STEVE GIRTON plays drums and canasta with Cincinnati's rock minstrels, "SISTERN". Former soundman for "AFGHAN WHIGS" and former of little clay ashtrays, Steve can be engaged for sound production at his recording facility and barbecue reception hall THE LIVING ROOM in Cincinnati (Well, it's actually in Newport, Kentucky but don't tell him that), as well as engaged in telephone conversation about the names he's given to his homemade ashtrays. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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BILL ALLETZHAUSER, a.k.a. LANCE OHIO,
that self-described, silver-tongued devil with a heart of gold, is
no more responsible for having been a previous midnight guitarist
of sensations "ASS PONYS" than he is. Or, yeah. Recovering from a rash of nasty hare-lip nightmares, Lance continues to spread himself thin as peak-season tour guide for the too fab "RUBY VILEOS" as well as being on-call 24 hours a day as a virtual uvular-care consultant. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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DAVE CHAMBERLAIN (left) and MIKE HANCOCK, or TASTE AND RELISH as they are known at the convent, are pure music junkies. Dave, having just completed a stint as drummer for every band in Ohio, is now sporting the title KING WANNAMONDO:YOU BRING IT, I BEAT IT for celestial constort "HEARTS OF PALM," legal trouble pending. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS)
Mike, lost and founding member of sadly defunct, improvisational, high-seas adventurers "MYSTERY MARY," is also a main ingredient of "CLUCK THE HEN," and "HEARTS OF PALM" in the Cincinnati musical breakfast cereal. A multi-instrumentalist like his compadres and a multi-mentalist like his imaginary friend PEDRO, Mike continually exercises his creative offerings until they are sweaty and need a shower. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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AMY CLUXTON is VACHE FOU (pronounced VAH-SHAY-FOW as in "foul" or "fowl," not the correct French pronunciation FOO as in, "I ain't French , you fool!"), or so she says. A winner of the prestigious "KRINOS" award, Vache can be heard pluckin', truckin', and shuckin' for quintessential quiddity "CLUCK THE HEN" over Cincinnati way. She also gives tap, disco, and sort-of-like-the-moon-walk-dance-but-much-more-impertinent lessons and enjoys baking liquids. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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ALI EDWARDS is no stranger to music as well as being no stranger than true. Formerly of Cincinnati's "SNAGGLETOOTH," Ali is now the front-runner and pole vaulter of that magnificent musical marinade, "RUBY VILEOS." In accordance with her religion, she respectfully requests that you do not eat and talk simultaneously, and that you purposefully confuse her with undercover FBI agent, Rodeo Queen. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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WILL RILEY has been a viscous, temporal musician ever since he was knee-high to a grass stain. Composer, and condemner of posing, Will has also been called a Hollywood FILM SOUND SUPERVISOR and MIXER in Hollywood, which is, of course, redundant. As CEO of "PLANETOFIDIOTS.COM," Will oversees such duties as exposing hypocracies in THE AMERICAN DREAM, as well as turning mattresses. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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PAUL C. SCOGLIO, noted author of "THE SNOW COW: AN UDDER ABLY COLD ACCOUNT OF AMERICA'S FORGOTTEN BEAST," has been a French horn virtuoso for minutes. Co-creator and co-performer of the infamous "DEATHLAND" sketch, Paul has been an irritant since the light ages. (MOTION DISCOMFORT, WHAT GIVES?, HARSH, BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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When
JEFF STOUT isn't being reprimanded, he's being SONIC
ELF.
Known prominently for his irascible, audacious,
oblique, cryptic vagueness, Sonic continually
attempts to reach new heights in his
quest to become KING OF THE UNKNOWN WORLD
through the power of want. He also likes
Grampy cartoons. Sonic Elf can be found playing in/with
his band, "The Insect Clicks". He's the one with unmistakable
antennae. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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WOODY
TRINKLE, MAGIC JAYBONE, or JAY WILSON as his keeper likes to call
him, has never seen daylight. A constant, consummate contributor
to the magical dregs of Cincinnati's musical life, Jay adds his own
31 flavors to the likes to such boffo bands as "Hearts of Palm" and "Cluck
the Hen". He enjoys the fiercely competitive ancient sport of
PAINTBALL HAIKU and sleeps standing up. (BUTTERFLIES AND ALIENS) |
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